Fichigan

Choosing a Fishing Buddy

I would never say your choice of fishing buddy is more important than your choice of spouse because my wife would use it against me. However, if your marriage is successful you will be spending more time with him than her so it is critical to make sure he meets a basic list of criteria to ensure your happiness until death do you part.  In no particular order here are some considerations:

Find a guy with a big SUV – something that will hold his and your fishing and camping gear. Conversely, make sure you own a small gas getter that is impractical for camping. Take out the passenger seat if he starts talking about using your car. You can always say the bolts rusted off.

He must be taller than you. I’ll have to work on the reasons but that’s my gut feeling.

It helps if your fishing buddy is honest since he won’t be able to lie about the fish he caught. Nothing more aggravating than telling a whopper and having your buddy tell a bigger one. In fact, make sure he’s not a good story teller – that’s your job.

If he is insecure that is a bonus since he will likely want to please everyone, including you. He’ll probably show up with cold drinks, sub sandwiches and even some granola bars for when you’re on the stream.  Thank him of course, but don’t feel guilty because you’d be playing right into his hands.

Make sure he can filet fish because you never really got the hang of it and sure hate to waste good meat.  Also, make sure he has some decent camp cookware and a camp stove in case you want a trout dinner cooked by a master chef (him).

If he has a nice boat add ten points. If he can launch it by himself add five more.

Make sure he doesn’t own a dog. If you’re OK with dogs you might be able to work around this until his dog has your number. When a dog figures out every time you show up he gets left behind it can get pretty ugly.

If your potential fishing buddy has a hot wife that can cook, add two points.

Try to find someone with a sense of humor because there’s nothing funny about fishing. Fishing is the original anti-hysterical activity. You want someone that can say something off the wall after four hours of mind-numbing biteless ozone fishing.  One funny comment can mean the difference between a forgettable trip and an unforgettable trip.

Based on all of the above – I may be the best fishing buddy ever!  I’ll have to ask Feral.